Tuesday, March 13, 2012

A Pessimist's Guide to Optimism III

Lesson #1: the bad that didn't happen.
Lesson #2: the good that almost happened.

And now...prepare yourself...you are ready for Lesson #3: cautious optimism - so long as you don't tell anyone.

If you tell, you may ruin your chances to make it to Lessons #4, #5, and #6. Yes, we are only half-way there. This is a six month process. Studies* have shown that advancing too quickly from pessimism to optimism can cause indigestion, nausea, muscle weakness, headaches, and a greater chance of relapse.

Don't tell anyone.

In the beginning, the devil on your shoulder wondered what was going on and felt the onset of nervousness. However, step three sets off alarms of panic. He'll be looking for the following red flags...

An overabundance of smiling
A mild feeling of hope
Cheerful conversations
Waking up on the right side of the bed

...anything to verify the onset of actual optimism. But these red flags will be difficult for him to spot if you don't tell anyone. Then come back next month for step four.

Good luck!

*I made this part up


J. A. Bennett said...

I love these side effects, I might have to give it a try :)

Leslie Rose said...

Now those are some side effects I can wrap my mind around.

Southpaw said...

What a nice, positive post.

gaylene said...

This is my kind of lesson.

Shelley Sly said...

I like this series. I also admire your very scientific research. ;)

But really, I'm trying to give cautious optimism a try. I usually expect failure in every area of my life, but a little bit of hope might drive me forward.

Laura Marcella said...

You should receive the Nobel Prize for Research*. You find the best scientific studies!

*not sure if this is an actual Nobel Prize, but we could make it be one. :)

Susan Oloier said...

What a great series of lessons :-) Cautious optimism. Now that I can handle.

Carolyn V said...

Yeah cautious optimism! I love the side effects too. Yikes, very frightening. ;) Can't wait for 4,5 & 6.

Cat Lavoie said...

Love it! Wouldn't want any of those nasty side effects! Can't wait for the next lesson! :)